Tag Archives: Children

Can someone please tell me why we don’t castrate men who rape our children???

I just don’t get it. Is it because the idea of taking away someone’s precious penis is just too much to bare for men? Is the idea of injecting, basically female birthcontrol, into a man, so horryfing to other men because it may hurt the sex drive, interfere with manliness, or a desire to live, that we cease to take steps to actually do something effective to get rid of child molesters? 

I think it is pretty clear. If you try and fuck children, you have a problem. If you look at pictures of infants and get a hard on, you have a problem, if you abduct and rape them, you have a big fucking problem. But apparently, you can molest them, over 70 times and go to prison for a few years and be back at it. But please, stick to the conditions of your release and stay away from schools because we banned you from doing that. Right.

Have we not learned anything? Sexual gratification is a pretty big motivator and when your brain and penis are hardwired in a fucked up way that makes you perceive a toddler as sexy, even once, maybe you should lose your right to have any sex drive at all. 

Now personally, I would say, remove the whole penis. Cut the whole thing right off. 

But really, a more “humane” answer already exists. Injections. Like every four months and then….bye bye sex drive, protect the children. 

How can we let someone like Danial Todd Gratton troll our playgrounds? Often, the police don’t want these fuckers back out there. But hey, the guy played nice in prison, not too many seven-year-olds in there to tempt him, and then he voluntarily goes to counselling and so he is not considered high risk. Did we forget he molested several children including one more than 70 times? What about those children’s lives? What about the little ten-year-old who he threatened with death this week? How is she going to adjust? And we don’t know what he did to her but I’m sure it wasn’t pretty. 

But hey, at counselling they told Gratton, let’s work to fight against those urges. Sure, then he goes home and online and looks at all the little children out there being abused and gets hot and horny. And these guys are everywhere. They wont tell you where but trust me, in your neighbourhood, maybe in your building, maybe at your work, maybe coaching your kid’s softball team. But as long as we decide to pretend that these guys can get “better”, nothing will change. 

And maybe if we started castrating all the guys we catch, a few others would actually be deterred. It’s one thing to be shamed and go to prison. It’s another to live your life signing it soprano.

Everyday you read a story about another ten men brought down for abusing children, distributing child porn, looking at these vile pictures of poor children being mutilated and tortured and getting off on it. Actually having orgasms when they see a child crying because their little vagina is being ripped open. Let’s get fucking real. These people are a plague on our society. Targeting our children for fucks sake.  Do they really deserve to be allowed to carry around their weapons? Fuck no. 

Let’s not get tough on crime by keeping these guys in prison for a year longer. Let’s really do something about this. And not a voluntary program. What the hell is that.

For child abusers, bring on the mini-guillotine. Off with their heads!!!!

[And now the worst thing is, I get to see the search terms that show up when trolls accidently come to my blog looking for kiddie porn: sadly, their searches will far outnumber those from people looking for news and commentary.]

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Filed under Canadian Government, Canadian News, Government intervention, Sexual Violence, Sexual violence against children

Cause every little girl wants to grow up to be a stripper…..

A very interesting report put out by the Quebec status of women, (which still receives funding because apparently women are still considered equal in Quebec) points out a huge problem with marketing sex to prepubescent girls. The report makes several recommendations on how to improve the equality of women by helping young girls to understand and resist the marketing machines that are turning them into pint size sex objects.

A great article in the Gazette by Brett Bundale sums up the problem nicely in the intro:

Walking down some stretches of Ste. Catherine St., you might have trouble telling a strip club and a toy store apart.
Dolls come dressed with black leather miniskirts, fishnet stockings, thigh-high boots and red feather boas.
The ads for Club Super Sexe portray women as girls, with pigtails, schoolgirl skirts and ruffles.

Bundale goes on to discuss:

Padded bras and thongs advertised to 7-year-olds.

The fact that 65% of girls aged 12-17 have experienced mental or physical sexual violence

And that 20% of girls who had sex before 16 thought that they had to.

Hmmmmm…..I wonder where they, and the young guys having sex with them, got all these messages about sex.

Besides the La Senza girls and the Brat dolls, teens see porn. They see sex on TV, in the movies at their friends but mostly on the internet. Sadly, we all know what the internet looks like. And trust me, your 12-year-old did not click the “I’m under 18 button.” What a joke.

And you may supervise your kids on computers at home, but when they are at Jimmy’s……or Cara’s……..exactly…..you had an inkling.

While we as teens, may have stumbled across dad’s Playboy, kids these days, get face shots, double penetrations and maybe an occasional round with a donkey. It’s a fact of life. It’s not a pretty fact that our internet is completely dominated by porn. When my liberal feminist blog brings people to my articles because they did a search for “kiddie vagina” or “teen face shots” I am extremely discouraged with our world. But then I think, maybe they’ll read about what a young student escort is really thinking when she has sex with them and they wont be able to get it up next time and maybe stay home and read a good book instead. (Yes, I’m an optimist) A digressing one…

The report’s conclusion states that the main concern is that young girls feel increasingly like objects. This is a horrifying by-product of our current cultural climate.

I remember feeling very empowered as a 14-year-old listening to the Sunday Night Sex Show with Sue, reading Sassy magazine, listening to Liz Phair.

Today, these girls have Paris Hilton, Jessica Simpson and Jaime Lynn Spears as role models. Be stupid, look pretty and you’ll bag a rock star or a hockey player. (And totally have the coolest babies with them.)

I remember so clearly the day I realized that most likely, in tight jeans, as I walked away guys would check out my ass. I was 27. Growing up, it never even crossed my mind that as I schooled a guy at pool, because I used to be a bit of a teen shark, he may have been looking for cleavage as I leaned over the table. And maybe, thanks to my mom and her dress code for my early years, I didn’t feel like a sex object until I was able to understand what that meant and deal with it accordingly. (O.K. maybe I clued in a bit late, but trust me, it wasn’t a bad thing.)

Today, young girls become sex objects at such a young age. They don’t get a chance to play on the ball field with the guys without worrying that since it’s chilly out their nipples may be showing and the second baseman will for sure notice so they might as well miss that fly ball. Or maybe they are wearing extra short shorts so that the centre fielder misses his own fly balls. Same diff…

What we have is a big cultural void for our young girls. They don’t have Riott Girl and 80s career movies. They don’t have Liz Phair singing about one-night-stands and Ani Difranco about periods. They get Surf School instead of Fast Times at Ridgemont High. They look up to Venessa Hudgens, not for the brutalness that is High School Musical, but because they  know that in real life, the actress landed a sweet gig, posted nude pics, and is actually dating Zach Efron and can make out anytime when Disney is not in charge.

The markets feel that selling sex to teens is worth while. Clearly it’s worth while because it works. These little girls are eating it up and nothing is standing in the way. Or at least competing.

So the Quebec report makes some recommendations. Among them:

– Discuss sexuality and the media in the ethics and religious culture course that is to begin in public schools this fall.
– Launch a media awAreness campaign to promote equality.
– give youths and parents better access to information about sexuality.

Now besides the fact that these recommendations are totally mundane and most likely useless, they are important in that they will get people who can have some influence some information and hopefully a kick in the ass to take action.

But I have a few recommendations of my own:

  • Teach your girls that they are not different from boys in that they will be curious about sex, have sexual feelings and want to explore their sexuality. Then talk to them about doing things and behaving in ways that make them feel good about themselves and not bad.
  • Tell your girls, as my mom told me: “You have your whole life to dress like a tart, preserve being a kid, it’s the best life has to offer, it will go quickly, don’t rush it.”
  • ENROLL YOUR GIRLS IN SPORTS!!!!!! And not ballet, horse back riding and yoga. Sports. Like soccer, football, hockey. Trust me, when the other girls make fun of Molly for wearing eyeliner to practice, she will think twice about how cool it is. And unlike dancing, girls bring the skills they learn playing these sports with them everywhere in life. Whether it’s a 21st birthday party at a bowling alley, a pick up game of football at the company barbecue or a game a pool at the singles bar, women with skills, agility and physical acumen kick ass. (not to knock dancing etc. but supplements of sports are well worth while.)
  • Talk to your boys. It is not cool to have conquests. It is not cool to brag about what you’ve done. The boys who don’t need to beg for it or tell everyone about it are always the ones that all the girls swoon over. If he really likes you, and you like him, he’ll wait. If not, he’ll leave right after. Let’s get real here.
  • Ask your girls how they feel about their bodies, about boys. Ask them if they are being pressured, harassed, or our curious about making out. Trust me, if you never ask, she will never tell you. Girls are scared to talk about these things. They are scared to talk about sexual violence. They feel guilty and don’t want you to know. But often, they really want to tell you….if you ask.
  • And: don’t treat your girls like little wall flowers who only do what boys want and have no hormonal desires themselves. Childhood innocence is pretty much a bust. Preserve it for as long as it will last, but once it’s over, it’s really over, so get real. She can google it and trust me, you don’t want her to follow the advice on hotteensexforu.com.

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Filed under advertising, Parenting, Uncategorized

Mr. Good Enough????

So this whole “Settle for Mr. Good Enough” advice being spewed by basically single women pushing forty who want babies and think back, romantically in a hindsight is 20-20 kind of way, on Billy and his University letterman jacket and that despite his penchant for funneling beer he probably would have been a great husband and dad….is really making me feel ill.

Have you ever read an article saying: “Hey, men, stop being choosy, downgrade because you don’t want to be alone.” Come on. I mean some of these articles are telling women not to care if the guy has really bad breath, if he shares your values. Ya, that’s all that matters. Right. And if you never have sex, share a cuddle, or even a close conversation ever again, it wont matter because you both wanted two kids, a boy and a girl, and a four door sedan, colour grey.

Romantic love is not dead. And sure, not everyone is going to meet their dreamboat but really, is giving up and settling for the guy you’re seeing when you think it might be time to “settle down” a smart move? The advice being barfed out by said spinsters is that online is where it’s at to find a partner of equal ideals and values. Here’s a second opinion: GET OFF THE INTERNET. You cannot custom order romance. Your ideal lover does not exist in the boxes that you check. You probably don’t know what you want, need or will be attracted to. I think Internet dating is a big sham. Not to say that some couples do not find eachother online and make it work, but for most: Disaster. And why…..???? Because we don’t know what is best for us when it comes to romance.

So many of my female friends think they know exactly what the “right” guy for them is like. He’s tall, blond, has two degrees, lives downtown, has a car, has traveled extensively, is close to his mother and has a dog – for example. Ummmmm fuck. Talk about being narrow minded. Maybe the perfect guy for this girl is a huge hippie, orphan, artist, who has never left the country. He digs her power career and worldliness, she comes to love his backrubs and marijuana cookies. They live perfectly and happily ever after. Because he wasn’t ordered to go online.

I just have this theory that as we get older we become so picky, so set in our ways. I have spoken to friends who went on dates and ended relationships for the most ridiculous reasons. One friend never called a guy again because he showed up for dinner with her and he had already eaten. Gee, what a loser. Maybe the guy had to eat at an after work ordeal. Maybe he had low blood sugar and couldn’t wait for the date. Maybe he was hungry and didn’t want to be Mr. Grumpy Bear. Who cares. But all the talk of the first minutia moves that a guy makes are so ridiculous. Remember the old adage: opposites attract. I’m a believer. And I don’t think we can chose a guy like we chose a pizza. Sure you think the thin crust is healthier and ham the only meat for you, but have you really ever tried chicken with the barbecue sauce and splurged for the extra cheese? And what about hot peppers? Never thought you like that kind of heat jazzing up your pizza did you?

And trust me, even if a guy shares the same values (mini barf) as you, if he can’t make your toes curl in bed, or heart swell with a great conversation, or make you proud to be at his side when you walk down the street: Good Luck. Mr. Good Enough will make you feel like Mrs. Settled and the two of you will live ever after in Mediocrity. But hey, at least you’ll have children. Little Boring and her younger brother Mundane.

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Filed under Relationships, Uncategorized

Free-range Children? How about free-range Parents?

The latest “craze” lifestyle journalists are writing about is the so-called free-range parenting ‘movement’. The gist: after years of over parenting, over-scheduling and over-hand holding their children, some parents are turning their back on the child-centered model toward a more, care-free, unstructured methodology. 

Both the Globe and Mail and the National Post have weighed in on this ‘BIG NEW TREND’…

The free-range child and Back to baby basics  are two articles filled with examples of this ‘sweeping’ trend because some parents, seemingly all from downtown Toronto, have decided not to enroll their kids in activities every day of the week. Wow, what a breakthrough. 

I think that while it is noteworthy and a good sign that parents are realizing child-centered obsessive parenting is not really good for anyone, what remains absent from these articles, and from parenting today in general, is the consideration of the parent. Now I don’t have any children and I am sure many people will think that I cannot possibly know anything until I’m changing diapers, functioning on very little sleep and dealing with all of those pressures and stresses that come with parenting, but ya know, I think as an outsider, looking in and observing, I have made a few realizations.

Number 1: Today’s child is the head of the household. Time and time again, I am witness to this problem. “We have to leave because little Emma needs to sleep in her own bed.” Or, “it’s past little Jacob’s bed time so we really need to be going now” or “we asked little Rosie (who is 2) where she wanted to go for the weekend but she just wanted to stay around home and play on her swing set.” “She’ll speak when she is ready.” “He’ll let us know when he does not want to sleep in the family bed anymore.” Don’t children need rules, structure and boundaries? Isn’t one of the good things about having a kid that you can kindof tell them what to do and they have to listen?

I remember my bedtime was 7:30 for like, my whole life. I asked my mom recently why I had such an early bedtime. She said, “I never said you had to go to bed at 7:30, you just had to be in your room. You could read, or draw or whatever but your dad and I wanted time for ourselves in the evening so that was the rule.” Awesome, I think, what a cool trick. I never suffered from too much sleep or down time. In fact I remember naming all my stuffed animals and making up elaborate plays involving the different characters each night. And all the while, my parents were making out on the couch to Unsolved Mysteries. Who Knew?

Number 2: Parents are obsessed with keeping their child safe, organic and perpetually comfortable. “Only the best for our spawn!” Once after Frisbee practice for my old women’s team, one of the girls, went outside the circle where we were all taking off our cleats and lit a smoke. She knew that most of us didn’t smoke and so she gave us some space and in my opinion was being very considerate if not overly concerned. One of the women however had just had a baby. The baby was asleep in her stroller when all of a sudden, mom caught a wiff of smoke from 100 feet away. She screamed, loudly, “Who is smoking. Oh my God. The baby, the baby get away, get away from my baby.” It was like if the smoke reached the vicinity of the baby, the baby would immediately expire.

This kind of behavior however is so commonplace. Like everyone has to evolve to make your baby comfortable. I have friends that wont even come over to our house because we have a dog. Yes, our chocolate lab may very well think your baby is a big denta bone. And then when parents bring their baby, I can’t believe how much shit they have. Sorry parents but you are victims of the latest marketing machine. Ya know, baby chic, crib consumers…Today’s young parent with some disposable income apparently thinks he or she needs all the shit advertised to them. Designer clothes to catch spit-up? This gadget for their posture, this blender for their food, this mobile will make them smarter, this diaper cream will make their bottoms shine. Such overkill. My good friends two-year old has about four times as much clothes as she does.

Number 3: Moms have no lives. And I’m sorry but anything including baby in the title does not count as part of your separate life as a woman. “But I have a life. I go to baby yoga, baby movies, mommy and me classes, baby sign language and baby book club.” Ummmm….Baby barf. How about getting away from baby? Why do so many new mothers think that of they leave their child for one moment that the child will freak or be unable to cope and why do so many young mothers become unable to get away from their babies? An old friend of mine, with three children recently went to the park with his 5 and 3 year-olds for the first time without his wife. This was the first time he had been alone with his own children. And he is not a slacker dad, she is one possessive mom. Another friend has never, ever left her 8 and 6 year olds with a babysitter. Unless her parents are available to babysit, the kids are with her. What does this do to one’s marriage, to one’s sanity? And I know others who wont even leave their kids with their parents. They raised you, what are they going to do, feed your kid non-organic cookies?

Moms need a life, and the kind of life where one can escape and not be called, or refer to oneself, as mommy. Sometimes I think new moms forget what their names are. How can a woman, with a masters in engineering, who used to manage her department, all of sudden be happy having no identity outside of mommykins? Truthfully, I don’t think she can. Not to say she can’t be happy and fulfilled as a mother, but I think she needs some other things in her life. A night out with other engineers, a steamy date night with her man, whatever, just something. I have seen it so many times, that couples no longer go out at all. They live for the baby. Sex life, out the window, and what for? Junior is going to grow up and leave, well he’ll probably be like 32 before he leaves since mom still does his laundry and dad doesn’t make him pay rent for the air-conditioned, big-screen t.v. and pool-table toting, open-bar downstairs guest room he calls his own, but one day, it will happen and mom and dad will only have each other. What then?

Number 4: Parents seem to think that they are so damn amazing for producing offspring. Sorry to say, but it is actually really easy to reproduce, in general. So great, I am sure it was the most amazing day of your life when you brought little Madison into the world, but really, big deal, you clean diapers, you missed nap time, you just bought another stroller, Maddie’s poo is yellow but smells better when she eats carrots. What if working women were to go on and on about their jobs like mothers do about their babies or even pregnancies. “Well I’m so tired today because I had this crazy deadline and I had to get this report done and you wouldn’t believe it but the printer just wouldn’t work. I checked to see if I had set it up correctly and I had, so then I restarted my computer, to no avail. And so I was forced to go and ask someone to have a look at it. Well this took a very long time. Well finally it worked but ya know, the ink was not the same black colour it usually is. It was actually more or a brown/black and it was a bit runny. Which made me worry. I have a feeling something is really wrong with the printer. The help desk guy assures me I’m just being paranoid, but I read online that….” I think you get the point.

What ever happened to just living your life and not planning every second of it. So the free-range child does not have an activity every day of the week, will that make him or her happier? Maybe, but what if children fit into the parents’ life instead of everything changing to suit the child? Now of course lots of things have to change when you have a kid. I’m sure the all night benders or 5 hours on a patio drinking pitchers or other silly, risk-taking behavior us free-range adults partake in may need to be amended, but really, I don’t think having kids means losing yourself and becoming someone so different you aren’t even recognizable.

So I hope the free-range movement is just a pre-curser to the live-life movement that involves healthy behavior and a lack of structure and regulation for the kids and more importantly for mom and dad as well.

P

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Filed under Parenting, Uncategorized