Toilet Tales

For your Friday entertainment.

The following is a script for a short film. The entire story takes place in a bathroom. It’s a juicy little tale about a bunch of 20-somethings and their dramas. Enjoy!

TOILET TALES
INT. BATHROOM – DAY
Inside a large, funky, colorful, bathroom of a student type house, Arlee is busy cleaning. She is 23 years old, loving, energetic, and always the hostess. The bathroom is filled with products, his and hers, magazines and comic books, and is very cozy. Jacob, 27, patient, playful and easygoing, Arlee’s boyfriend whom she lives with, enters.
ARLEE
(Hearing Jacob come in)
Hey sugar.
JACOB
(Looking down at Arlee’s panties peeking out from under her jeans as she scrubs the floor)
Ummmm plumber’s bum.

ARLEE
(Giving Jacob a look)
I know… Why don’t you help me?

Jacob gets on top of Arlee who is busy scrubbing the floor. He turns her over and they kiss on the wet floor.
ARLEE
You realize people will be here soon.
JACOB
They’re always late, especially your friends.
ARLEE
(Laughing)
Right… Are Kevin and Sarah even coming? I don’t know if Sarah will let Kevin out to play with us.
JACOB
They said they would be here.
ARLEE
So we get to meet the famous Zoë tonight.
JACOB
Zoë?
ARLEE
(Hitting him)
Mike’s new girlfriend.
JACOB
Ohhhh. The model. Does what’s her face know she’ll be here?
ARLEE
Can you not call my best friend what’s her face please.
JACOB
You know who I mean.
ARLEE
Still it sounds so derogative. She’s your friend too.
JACOB
Oh don’t take a suck. It doesn’t mean anything. I call everyone what’s your face.
ARLEE
Anyway. Lisa knows Zoë’ll be here. She promised not to make a scene. We are all going to be nice to the new girl.
JACOB
I’ll be especially nice. Model will feel right at home.
Arlee grabs Jacob’s boxers and pulls them up as high as she can giving him a wedgie. Jacob squeals like a girl and fights Arlee off. They kiss again and Jacob leaves pulling his underwear out of his butt.
JACOB CONT.
I’ll go check on the food.
ARLEE
No Eating!
FADE TO BLACK
INT. BATHROOM – EARLY EVENING
Bathroom clean and shiny, the door opens and Lisa, 24, hyper, emotional, pessimistic, an alcoholic and Arlee’s best friend, bursts in wearing one shirt and carrying another. Arlee stands in the doorway.
LISA
So I couldn’t decide which one was better so I brought both. You have to tell me which one works. I’m thinking this one might be a little too flashy.
ARLEE
I like it. You should go with some colour. You always wear black.
LISA
(Taking off the one shirt unabashedly and trying on the other black one)
I do not. Well how bout this one. Is it sexy enough?
ARLEE
Are you trying to pick up tonight?
LISA
I just wouldn’t mind looking hot tonight. I know I’m not model material but…
ARLEE
Lis, You two broke up months ago. You don’t need to compete.
LISA
I know we broke up and I know it wouldn’t have worked
(Picking up a perfume bottle and smelling it)
out anyway but I just want to remind him of what he is missing…has lost.
(Motioning to the bottle)
I know it’s your favorite but can I use a little?
ARLEE
(Nodding)
I think you look awesome. I love your cleavage.
LISA
Not bad huh? I bet waify has no boobs.
Arlee rubs Lisa’s back and leaves. Lisa gives a smile to the mirror which turns into a sad face. She picks up her drink, gives a cheers to the mirror and downs it. She hears a male voice in the hallway and exits.
FADE TO BLACK

INT. BATHROOM – EARLY EVENING
Voices are heard in the hallway and people can be seen just outside the bathroom. The front door to the house is to the right of the bathroom, making the entranceway visible from within the bathroom. Scott, Jacob’s best friend, 27, handsome and extremely outgoing has arrived.
SCOTT
(Carrying a case of beer and single yellow rose)
I’m here.
JACOB
Hey man. You shouldn’t have.
SCOTT
(Giving Jacob the rose)
This is for you and these are for Arlee.
ARLEE
(Taking the beer)
Thanks Scott. I’ve been practicing my chugging.
SCOTT
OOOooo. Chicks chugging beer. Sexy!
ARLEE
You remember Lisa Scott.
SCOTT
Why of course I do. You still single?
LISA
(Cheersing again, new drink in hand which spills a little)
Swingin.
SCOTT
Excellent.
The friends move away from the entrance.
FADE TO BLACK
INT. BATHROOM – EVENING
The door opens and Zoë walks in. She is 25, beautiful, stylishly dressed and clearly “the model”. She is acting nervous yet confident in her appearance. Zoë closes and locks the door, checks that it is locked twice and then takes a deep breath. She opens her purse removes a few products and proceeds to “fix” herself up. As she is reapplying her lipstick, Zoë looks around the room. She is very curious about the bathroom. She picks up a fashion magazine and flips the pages looking at the models within. She suddenly realizes that someone is trying to open the door. She feels nervous and afraid to leave the bathroom. There is now a knock at the door but Zoë is afraid to answer. The person outside, Amanda, a good friend of Arlee’s, 24, aggressive, outspoken and slightly rude, now begins to pound on the door.
AMANDA
If there is someone in there, they better open up or this door is coming down.
ZOË
(Speaking with a soft European accent)
Ah, sorry, I’m coming.
Zoë quickly gathers her stuff and opens the door. Amanda pushes her aside, not even noticing who she is or caring, and slams the door in her face. Amanda quickly hikes up her skirt and sits tentatively down on the toilet. She is clearly in a lot of pain. She squints her eyes as she tries to pee but cannot. She is very frustrated and draws in air through her teeth in pain.
AMANDA
Ouw, Ouw, Ouw.
Amanda gets up and goes to the sink. She splashes water on her face to stop herself from crying. She opens the medicine cabinet and rifles through. She reads the back of some bottles and picks out some Advil. She takes four pills without water and leaves the bathroom.
FADE TO BLACK

INT. BATHROOM – EVENING
Mike, 24, honest and confident, Arlee and Jacob’s close friend, Lisa’s ex-boyfriend, and Zoë’s current boyfriend, enters the bathroom covered in red wine. Leaving the door open he starts to try and clean his shirt. Zoë enters shortly after him carrying a package of salt.
ZOË
Here darling, try some salt, it will take out the wine.
MIKE
Thanks Zo. I guess you can’t expect to go to a party without some casualties. How are you holding up? They’re not too scary are they?
ZOË
No no. They are as sweet as you said. I am feeling a little overdressed though.
MIKE
Don’t pay any attention to Lisa. She only said that because she’s jealous. Canadians always dress so plain. Give me a Euro babe any day. Women should look sexy and feminine.
ZOË
But I feel like they all think that I am trying to look better than them.
MIKE
Hey, you can’t help it. You would look better in sweatpants.
ZOË
Lisa is pretty.
MIKE
(Grabbing her and kissing her)
Forget Lisa.
LISA
(Standing in the doorway to the bathroom)
You were saying.
Zoë quickly ducks under Lisa’s arm and exits the bathroom.
MIKE
Why do you have to be a bitch to her? It’s not her fault we broke up.
LISA
(Clearly drunk, taking another big gulp of her drink)
No, that would be your fault.
MIKE
Get over it Lisa. All you are doing is reminding me of what a good decision I made.
Lisa gives Mike an evil look and goes to finish her drink. Mike grabs it out of her hand and some spills on the floor.
MIKE
I don’t think you need anymore.
LISA
I don’t think you have any place to say a goddamn fucking thing.
MIKE
(Shoving the glass back in her hand and pushing past her)
My mistake, please… carry on.
Lisa slams the door, turns and kicks it with a scream. She grabs her toe and stumbles to the floor where she remains leaning against the door. She begins to sob, looking at her toe that is now bleeding. Arlee pushes the door open but Lisa is blocking it.
ARLEE
Lis… Let me in.
LISA
Can you just go.
ARLEE
(Squeezing in through the door)
No. I’m not going anywhere.
Arlee closes and locks the door.
ARLEE CONT.
Lisa, you’re bleeding.
Arlee goes to the medicine cabinet and takes out some alcohol pads and Band-Aids. She sits beside Lisa and begins to clean and bandage her cut toe.
LISA
He is such an asshole.
ARLEE
It takes time. It isn’t easy but..
LISA
Oh how the hell would you know? You have everything. You have always had everything. You get what you want. You have what you want. How can you say shit?
ARLEE
Lisa, that’s not fair…
LISA
Fuck fair.
Lisa starts to cough and crawls over to the toilet and begins to vomit. Arlee moves over and pulls her hair out of her face as she vomits.
LISA
Perfect Arlee, cleaning up Lisa’s mess, yet again.
ARLEE
It’s o.k., you’re aloud to be upset. You’re aloud to be angry, and you’re aloud to take it out on those who love you, but you should maybe listen a little too.
LISA
Listen…
ARLEE
Yes. It is over with you and Mike. Right now you are grieving. But soon you will realize that it is a good thing.
LISA
Oh ya, being alone is just fucking dandy.
ARLEE
It’s O.k. to be alone.
LISA
How would you know? You and Jacob have been together for five years. When’s the last time you were alone? You don’t know anything about being alone, about trying to find that someone. About trying to be happy.
ARLEE
You don’t need someone else to be happy. You have you. And you are smart and beautiful, and you can do anything that you want. You don’t have to have to think about someone else and what they want. You don’t have to make compromises.
LISA
And that’s the worst thing. Making fucking compromises. Oh Arlee, I feel so sorry for you. Poor fucking Arlee.
ARLEE
Look Lisa, I’m not saying feel sorry for me. I’m just saying think of the good things. You can make your own choices and do the things that you’ve always wanted to do. You don’t have to consider someone else.
LISA
So it’s Jacob’s fault that you never got to go live in Asia.
ARLEE
Truthfully. Yes. It is his fault. In a way. You have known me forever and you know how much I wanted to go and live abroad but I can’t now. Jacob’s job is here and he isn’t interested in traveling. So that’s fine, I’ve dealt with that. But it’s not such a horrible thing to have the option of doing things that you have always wanted to do.
LISA
How bout wanting someone who loves me. How bout wanting someone to share life with. How bout wanting someone to make me happy.
ARLEE
Do you really think that you need someone else to make you happy?
LISA
No…but it helps.
ARLEE
How bout being swinging single?
LISA
Being single is all fun and bunny rabbits until you wake up the next morning alone and hung over and feeling like, like your fucking useless and no one gives a shit about you.
ARLEE
No one huh. And what about all of us? We love you. You have all the support and love you need. You just need to realize that you can make yourself happy.
LISA
I need a fucking drink. That would make me happy.
ARLEE
Lis… I think you’ve had a lot and…
LISA
Look, if I am going to be single and liberated as you say, and if I don’t have to make compromises and sell my dreams to the boyfriend devil, then I am going to get shitfaced.
ARLEE
Lis…
There is knocking on the door.
AMANDA
I know you guys are having a moment and I know there is a mini crisis in progress, but if I don’t get in there, there is going to be a nasty mess out here.
LISA
(Cleaning the mascara from under her eyes and going to leave, empty glass in hand)
Well, we can’t have that now can we.
Lisa opens the door and Amanda gives her a hug and kiss.
AMANDA
If I were a guy… or a lesbian, I would do you.
LISA
Humph, I never knew you had such good taste.
AMANDA
Now outta my way, I think I’m gonna blow.
Arlee is washing her hands.
AMANDA
Out, out, out…
Amanda is trying to push Arlee out of the bathroom while her hands are still wet.
ARLEE
Jez, can I finish. It’s not like I’ve never seen you pee before.
AMANDA
Nope, out. Out.
Amanda pushes Arlee out the door.
ARLEE
Psycho, My hands are still wet.
Amanda opens the door and throws out a hand towel. She then closes and locks the door and barely manages to get her underwear off in time. She appears to be in grave pain. When she is done she stands and looks down. She is very upset by what she sees. She pulls out a strange tube from her purse and applies it between her legs. She is very squeamish and still in pain. She looks into the mirror very upset and concerned. She washes her hands and goes to leave. Scott is at the door as she opens it.
SCOTT
Hey good looking.
AMANDA
(Giving him a hug)
Scottie.
SCOTT
So it’s been awhile.
AMANDA
It has…
SCOTT
Are you still seeing that computer capitalist?
AMANDA
No. Definitely no.
SCOTT
One should always be wary of a guy who spends half his time in front of a computer and the other half at the gym.
AMANDA
I guess some guys aren’t able to maintain such a sexy physique just by eating hamburgers like you Scott.
SCOTT
Why thank you Amanda. And I thought you hadn’t noticed.
Amanda pats Scott’s tummy and Scott holds her hand there. He looks at her and some history of romance is apparent. He leans over to whisper in her ear.
SCOTT CONT.
I wish you’d reconsider. I know I’m no high-tech stud but I think you’d find dating me to be to your liking.
Scott then tries to nibble on Amanda’s ear. Initially she allows him to, smiling at the attention and affection. She then becomes upset and shakes him off.
Scott enters the bathroom leaving the door open and takes a pee. Sarah, 23, unfriendly, condescending and judgmental, is Jacob’s friend Kevin’s girlfriend. She approaches the opening to the bathroom.
SARAH
Ewww. That is so disgusting.
SCOTT
(Not even turning his head)
Oh relax Sarah. As if you have never seen a guy peeing. Don’t you and Kevin live together?
SARAH
Yes Scott we do. But if Kevin ever left the door open to pee, he would find himself homeless. I hope you plan on washing your hands.
SCOTT
(Walking past Sarah)
What for? I’m clean.
SARAH
Pig!
Sarah enters the bathroom and closes and locks the door. She is very upset that Scott left the toilet seat up and she takes some toilet paper in her hand in order to put the lid down. She then proceeds to put toilet paper on the seat before she sits down. She looks around at the acquired mess in the bathroom. She peers in the shower and notices some hair and makes a disgusted face. There is a knock at the door. Kevin, 28, cute, timid and friendly speaks.
KEVIN
Sarah, is that you in there?
SARAH
Yes Kevin, I told you I was going to the bathroom. Do you have to be so rude and interrupt me?
KEVIN
Sorry sweetie I just wanted to check and see if everything was all right.
SARAH
(Opening the door)
And what wouldn’t be all right?
(Whispering)
Besides the fact that this bathroom is disgusting. How much longer do we have to stay?
KEVIN
Aren’t you having fun? You seemed so happy and friendly.
SARAH
Because I have to Kevin. These are your supposed friends so I guess I have to be nice now don’t I.
KEVIN
They ARE my friends. And I don’t understand why you don’t like them.
SARAH
Well I don’t expect you to understand. You act like a child when you are with them. I mean playing those stupid drinking games. You sound like an idiot. At least we aren’t playing cards. Remember last time we played. You are the worst card player. I am never letting you be on my team again.
Arlee comes from outside into the entranceway carrying pizza.
ARLEE
Hey guys the pizza is here.
SARAH
Oh, I don’t eat pizza.
ARLEE
Oh, sorry Sarah, I didn’t know, can I get you something else.
SARAH
No. Thanks. I think I’m going to order some sushi actually. Would that be all right if it’s delivered here?
ARLEE
Oh, sure, but didn’t you want pizza Kevin?
KEVIN
Ahhhh, well…
(Looking at Sarah)
I think I’ll have sushi.
ARLEE
(Leaving)
Sure.
SARAH
I will go order us some sushi then.
KEVIN
O.K. I’m just going to use the bathroom.
SARAH
You should tuck in your shirt while you’re in there. It looks way better tucked in. I told you you should have worn the red one but what do I know?
Sarah kisses Kevin and then walks away. Kevin locks himself in the bathroom, goes pee and tucks in his shirt. He then proceeds to snoop. He opens cabinets and is looking through Arlee’s stuff. He spots her perfume bottle on the counter and picks it up. He smells it and reveals that he has hidden affections for her. He then glances up at a photo of Arlee and Jacob and appears very sad. He looks at himself in the mirror and decides to un-tuck his shirt. He pulls out the front, pauses, and then puts it back in again, washing his hands and leaving the bathroom sadly.
JACOB
(Heard outside the bathroom)
Hey man. I saved you some pizza.
KEVIN
Thanks.
FADE TO BLACK
INT. BATHROOM – EVENING
Jacob is in the bathroom. As he is peeing, Arlee opens the door and closes it behind her. She goes to the mirror to adjust her hair.
ARLEE
Hey scrumptious. How are you doing?
JACOB
(Moving towards Arlee)
Good.
ARLEE
Having fun?
JACOB
(Putting his arms around Arlee from behind her)
For sure. Is Lisa O.K?
ARLEE
I don’t know. I’m worried about her.
JACOB
She’s pretty loaded hey.
ARLEE
Ya. I wish she wouldn’t drink so much, especially when she’s this upset. It definitely doesn’t help any.
JACOB
Maybe we can set her up with Scott. He’s always game.
ARLEE
I don’t think they would…work in that way.
JACOB
Why not? It would be fun.
ARLEE
Scott’s a player Jacob…

Scott opens the door and enters the bathroom
SCOTT
(Putting his arms around Jacob and Arlee)
Hey guys. Sorry to spoil your romantic moment but I gotta take a piss.
ARLEE
Speaking of Scottie.
SCOTT
Are you guys talking about me again? It’s about that threesome you want to have isn’t it?
JACOB
You’re a little too hairy for my liking Scott.
SCOTT
I could wax.
ARLEE
(Leaving)
Ewww. That’s a frightening thought.
SCOTT
(Closing the door)
Hey can I ask you a question?
JACOB
Shoot.
SCOTT
Do you know if Amanda is seeing anyone else?
JACOB
As far as I know she isn’t. She broke up with that what’s his face guy awhile ago. You looking to get lucky?
SCOTT
Man, is that all you think I’m after?
JACOB
Yep.
SCOTT
Well. That’s always fun, but I like Amanda. She’s so… bitchy.
JACOB
Well don’t tell Arlee, she’ll not be too excited to have you going after one of her friends.
SCOTT
Hey, I’m not just the guy that girls cheat on their boyfriends with.
JACOB
Alright changed man… I’m glad to see you have other angles.
Jacob leaves and Scott goes pee and then primes himself in the mirror. He is trying to look his best as he spritzes some hairspray in his hair awkwardly and then coughs from the fumes.
FADE TO BLACK

INT. BATHROOM – EVENING
Arlee, Kevin, Mike, Scott and Amanda enter the bathroom to smoke a joint.
ARLEE
It’s best if we smoke it in here with the fan because it won’t smell up the place.
AMANDA
(Lighting the Joint, smoking it and then passing it on)
No Problem!
MIKE
I like it in here.
AMANDA
It’s funny how much time is spent in the bathroom.
ARLEE
It’s the best place to retreat to.
SCOTT
I think the best part of the party goes on in here.
KEVIN
It’s like if you need to get away, you can just lock the door and hang out for a bit.
ARLEE
Forget kitchen parties, we’ve initiated the bathroom party.
AMANDA
Think of how much of our lives are spent in here.
MIKE
It’s the one private place where you can go and it’s perfectly acceptable to be alone for a while.
SCOTT
You have everything you need in here. A door that locks, running water, smelly stuff, girly mags…I could move into this bathroom.
ARLEE
Don’t get too comfortable.
Sarah opens the door and peeks in.
SARAH
Hey, are we going out or…Cause I really wouldn’t mind going to the bar soon.
ARLEE
Ohhh, but it’s so fun here with all of us. We don’t really need a bar to have fun do we?
AMANDA
I wouldn’t mind going dancing but we could set up a dance floor in your living room.
ARLEE
That’s fun. We could play the dancing game.
SARAH
Well…I guess Arlee always has to get what Arlee wants.
ARLEE
What’s that supposed to mean?
SARAH
Oh, you know what it means.
KEVIN
Hey guys, it’s o.k if we stay around here. Maybe we could go out to the bar next week.
SARAH
Only if that’s all right with Arlee, you should ask her Kevin.
ARLEE
What’s up? Are you mad about something?
MIKE
Hey. Let’s not get all upset. We’re having fun here.
ARLEE
Do I not have the right to ask her what that comment is supposed to mean?
MIKE
Um, I think someone is calling me.
AMANDA
Me too.
Mike, Amanda and Scott quickly leave the bathroom.
SARAH
You don’t have to make a scene Arlee. All I was saying is that you always have to have it your way. It doesn’t matter what everyone else wants to do.
ARLEE
Look, did I say something to piss you off or are you just trying to be a bitch.
SARAH
How bout New Years, remember how you just had to play spin the bottle? You ruined my party.
ARLEE
What are you talking about? I’m not the one that started that. It was Scott.
SARAH
Ya right. I know you started it. Think about how I felt being forced to kiss my boyfriend’s brother. And all my friends were there and they felt so uncomfortable.
ARLEE
What are you talking about. I had nothing to do with that. I even told Jacob that I thought it was a really bad idea being that it was all couples at that party and we didn’t know them all.
KEVIN
Arlee it’s not a big deal. Sarah was just upset…
SARAH
That’s what happens Arlee. You just think everyone should bow down to you and do whatever you want.
ARLEE
I don’t have to listen to this shit. I told you I had nothing to do with it and…
SARAH
(Crying)
Just admit it. You ruined my party. I was so embarrassed.
ARLEE
Ya, well fucking blame Scott. This is bullshit. Fuck you Sarah.
Arlee storms out.
KEVIN
Sarah, why did you have to bring that up?
SARAH
And why shouldn’t I Kevin. She deserves to get shit for it.
KEVIN
I agree you guys should talk about it but now, here.
SARAH
I’m just so tired of her getting away with everything.
ARLEE
(Re-entering the bathroom extremely angry)
Ya know what Sarah. If you aren’t even going to listen to my side or trust what I’m saying, I don’t want you in my house.
SARAH
Fine. I’m leaving.
JACOB
(Overhearing the conversation and entering)
What’s going on?
SARAH
We’re leaving.
Sarah takes off and Kevin follows her.
JACOB
What is wrong with you?
ARLEE
With me? She just freaked out and said “Arlee always has to get what Arlee wants.”
JACOB
Ya, well maybe you should think about that.
Jacob takes off and Arlee slams the door and is fuming. There is a knock at the door; Scott and Amanda are outside.
AMANDA
Ar, are you O.k.?
ARLEE
(Opening the door)
I am so mad. She had no right to do that.
SCOTT
What is she so pissed about?
ARLEE
She says that I ruined New Years.
AMANDA
New Years?
ARLEE
She says that it was my idea to play spin the bottle and that I ruined her party because it made everyone so upset.
AMANDA
She didn’t have to play.
ARLEE
Ya but it wasn’t me who started it. You know that Scott.
SCOTT
Hey, I was really really drunk. I don’t remember what happened.
ARLEE
Scott you started it. You were the only single one there.
SCOTT
Hey, I don’t remember what happened but I don’t think it was that big of a deal.
AMANDA
I guess it’s a big deal to Sarah.
ARLEE
And now Jacob’s all pissed off at me because they left.
SCOTT
Hey everyone is really drunk. No one will remember this tomorrow.
AMANDA
I think you have a thing or two to learn about girls.
SCOTT
Well at least they’ll pretend that they don’t remember it.
AMANDA
O.K, that’s enough from you. Out.
SCOTT
But I’m trying to be the comic release.
AMANDA
(Pointing out the door)
(Sarcastically)
Good job.
Scott leaves sadly and Amanda gives Arlee a big hug.
AMANDA CONT.
Now sweetie cake. Lets not worry about this. The next time you see her you guys will end up crying in the bathroom and then hugging and forget about all of this.
ARLEE
I don’t think so this time. Sarah really holds a grudge. She is so mad at me for no reason.
AMANDA
And maybe it has something to do with the fact that Kevin is so in love with you!
ARLEE
What! He is not.
AMANDA
Oh, the innocence. Of course he is. That’s why she feels so threatened by you.
ARLEE
Then why is Kevin with her? Why do you think he is in love with me?
AMANDA
He has been since university. He just can never have you. He knows it. Jacob is his best friend. It’s all right, he’ll get over it but I’m sure Sarah knows in that suppressed kind of way.
ARLEE
But now Jacob is so mad at me.
AMANDA
He’s just drunk and doesn’t know the whole story.
ARLEE
No. He thinks I’m pushing away his friends.
AMANDA
They’re your friends too. You and Sarah will work it out. And if not you’ll just have to let it go.
ARLEE
But I can’t handle her accusing me of something that I didn’t do.
AMANDA
I know, but let her be mad and just be the bigger person here. Don’t let her ruin your night.
ARLEE
You’re right. This party has been so fun and I don’t want it to be all ended and shitty now.
AMANDA
(Cupping Arlee’s face)
So let’s go out there… and you know no one will care… and we’ll continue our kickass night. K sweet face?
ARLEE
K. But I still don’t believe that Kevin is in love with me.
The girls hug and go to leave. Scott is at the door.
SCOTT
Everything better?
Arlee nods and moves past him. Scott grabs Amanda’s arm to get her to stay.
SCOTT
You know you’re very sexy when you abuse me.
Amanda tries to leave. But Scott grabs her and kisses her. She initially resists but then starts to kiss him back. Scott kicks the door closed and flicks off the light, a sole night-light illuminates their faces.
SCOTT CONT.
Now that’s what I call romantic lighting.
AMANDA
Ah, moonlight by glade plug in.
Scott turns her gently lifts her up on to the sink and kisses her softly. They begin to kiss more passionately and Scott is caressing Amanda’s legs. After some time, he attempts to put his hand up her skirt and she pushes him away.
AMANDA
Scott, what do you think you’re doing?
SCOTT
I’m so sorry, I thought…
AMANDA
Sure you did.
SCOTT
But it’s not that. I really like… I’m not just trying to… I…
AMANDA
(Flicking on the light and leaving)
Save it.
Scott is left alone very upset. He “adjusts” himself, sighs, and then leaves.
FADE TO BLACK
INT. BATHROOM – LATE
Lisa enters the bathroom a mess. She is stumbling everywhere. She sits on the ground and puts her face over the toilet. She vomits violently. Amanda bursts in the door having to go in a hurry.
AMANDA
Jesus Lisa, why are you such a lush?… I really have to use the bathroom.
Amanda tries to get Lisa to move but she wont. She then picks her up away from the toilet and proceeds to go in much pain.
LISA
What’s wrong with you?
AMANDA
Well let’s see. Maybe it’s the burning, maybe the itching, maybe the fact that I’m so angry. Or maybe, the fucking fact that I can’t even take a piss…

The door opens a crack but then shuts abruptly.

AMANDA CONT.
(Glancing at the door and then lowering her voice)
…without screaming in pain.

LISA
(Sitting up)
What?
AMANDA
Herpes Lisa. Herpes. I have Herpes.
LISA
Herpes. Oh my god.
Amanda throws her ointment bottle across the room with a scream.
LISA CONT.
From…
AMANDA
Yes from him. That fucker. He told me he had been tested for everything, then I find out from his x-girlfriend that she got it and that he knew about it.
LISA
Oh my god. Amanda I’m so sorry.
AMANDA
Ya, well there’s not much you can do about it. There’s not much anyone can do about it.
LISA
I don’t really know anything um about it but isn’t there a cure? It will be O.K. Won’t it?
AMANDA
There’s no cure. There’s no pill that will make it go away. It will come and go for the rest of my life and I will forever be cursed by trying not to spread it to someone else. A big dirty secret.
LISA
You don’t have to keep it a secret ya know. We aren’t going to judge you if that’s what you think. We’re your best friends and we want to help you. You shouldn’t have to deal with this on your own.
AMANDA
Well now you know. Should I take out an add, announce it at the dinner table. It’s not like I have a fucking flu.
LISA
What are the doctors saying? Are you on treatment?
AMANDA
I have goo to apply.
LISA
Why don’t you let me go to the doctors with you. You don’t have to deal with this on your own..
AMANDA
Look, I appreciate what you’re trying to do Lisa, but I don’t need this. I didn’t want anyone to know but now I guess they all have to.
LISA
Hey it’s your information to tell. I just think you are underestimating your friends.
AMANDA
Whatever. This conversation is over. Enough catharsis for one night.

Amanda leaves the bathroom and Lisa sadly gathers herself. Zoë enters the bathroom.
LISA
Oh Hi, I was just leaving. Sorry I’ll…
ZOË
Can I speak with you?
LISA
About what?
ZOË
I heard through the wall.
LISA
Heard what, what…
ZOË
I was waiting for the toilet and then Scott came and opened the door because he thought you two were just talking and then he realized…
LISA
You were eavesdropping…
ZOË
No, no. I am sorry I just heard what Amanda told you. I am sorry that …
LISA
And Scott?
ZOË
I don’t know, he left. He went to get cigarettes. I don’t know what he heard. He just knew it was personal and decided to leave you alone.
LISA
And maybe you should have done the same.
ZOË
My sister. She has it. Herpes. Amanda should not feel ashamed.
LISA
Ya, well I told her that but she’s not exactly ready to get over it.
ZOË
Well I just wanted to tell you that the women’s clinic has a group to discuss it. I went with my sister. It helps a lot to talk about it but you don’t want to have to go alone. I can get you the information if you would like. I didn’t want to just tell Amanda because it is very private and I am sorry for knowing.
LISA
Do a lot of people go to the clinic?
ZOË
Yes. It is a support group for women. They help you to deal with the emotional effects and to manage your symptoms and outbreaks. They are so friendly and helpful.
LISA
How’s your sister doing now?
ZOË
Very well. It has been over a year now and she is doing very good.
LISA
That would be really great if you could get that info for me. I think Amanda really needs something like that. She’s so stubborn and I think right now she’s really having trouble dealing with this. I guess anyone would.
ZOË
I have the numbers at home, should I call you?
Lisa looks around for a pen, finds an eyeliner pencil and writes her phone number for Zoë on a piece of toilet paper.
LISA
Thanks Zoë. Thanks.
Zoë nods her head and grabs Lisa’s hand.
ZOË
Amanda will be fine. She has great friends.
FADE TO BLACK
INT. BATHROOM – LATE
Arlee is washing her hands in the bathroom. Some time has passed as is indicated by the increased mess in the bathroom. The party is winding down. Jacob enters the bathroom looking for Arlee.
JACOB
Hey.
ARLEE
Hey.
JACOB
Lisa is in the guest room. She is going to stay over with Amanda and I’ll give them a ride home in the morning.
ARLEE
Good.
JACOB
Arlee…I’m…I talked to Amanda and I didn’t realize what happened.
ARLEE
I know you didn’t.
JACOB
I know it wasn’t your fault and I really shouldn’t have blamed you for fighting with Sarah. I just..
ARLEE
You were just a drunken asshole.
JACOB
I know. And I’m sorry.
ARLEE
Ya, well you should have thought of that. I needed you and your support and you really weren’t there for me.
JACOB
I really didn’t…
ARLEE
I don’t want to talk about this right now. I know you were drunk but that’s a pretty shit excuse.
JACOB
O.K.
Mike comes around the corner carrying his and Zoë’s coats.
MIKE
Hey guys, Zo and I are gonna take off now. Thanks so much for the awesome night.
ARLEE
(Giving Mike a hug)
It was fun wasn’t it?
MIKE
Fun and dramatic, just how I like it.
ARLEE
Where’s Zoë? I want to say goodbye, she is so cute.
MIKE
She’s saying bye to Lisa. I think they’re up to something.
Amanda comes with the phone.
AMANDA
Arlee, it’s Kevin.
ARLEE
Thanks.
Arlee moves just outside the bathroom to talk to Kevin on the phone. Everyone else is saying goodbye to Mike and Zoë.
ARLEE
(To Jacob)
Are we busy on Wednesday, Kevin wants us to go mini golfing with them?
JACOB
Sounds good.
Arlee leaves the front room in front of the bathroom and Mike and Zoë can be heard going out the front door. Jacob goes to find Arlee and Amanda and Scott are left just outside the bathroom door in the entranceway.
SCOTT
Pretty wild night huh?
AMANDA
Oh ya.
SCOTT
I guess I should be going… Hey, have you seen “Go Day” yet?
AMANDA
No. I hear it’s pretty interesting.
SCOTT
Well, would you want to go on Tuesday or something? It’s cheap day.
AMANDA
I don’t think that…O.K.
SCOTT
Ya.
AMANDA
Ya.
SCOTT
O.K. I’ll call you tomorrow with the time and place.
(Grabbing both her hands)
Thanks for givin a guy a chance.
AMANDA
It’s just a movie Scott…
SCOTT
Right. Goodnight.
(Yelling to Arlee and Jacob)
Bye crew. Thanks for the rager.
ARLEE AND JACOB
(From off screen)
Bye.
Scott leaves out the front door and Amanda leaves the doorway in front of the bathroom.
FADE TO BLACK
FADE UP FROM BLACK
The bathroom is alone and quiet lit only by it’s night-light. All the noises and conversations of the night begin to be heard whirling around in the bathroom. They get louder and more frantic until the night-light suddenly dies and all goes black and quiet.
FADE UP FROM BLACK
INT. BATHROOM – MORNING
Jacob opens the bathroom door, mop and pail in hand. He appears extremely hung over and ready to clean. He is disgusted by the mess and the cleaning job he has to do.

CREDITS

Advertisements

1 Comment

Filed under Short Film Script, Uncategorized

One response to “Toilet Tales

  1. Top Blog! a bit long winded but fab anyway.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s